Oh you. You two. You're really cute and you're all over my internet. Make it stop.
Seriously, it's too much. We get it, the web gets it, God and my parents and everyone else gets it. You guys really like each other, probably even love each other, and it makes me feel funny. Funny like I'm the 2012 version of Mary Tyler Moore, and while she was cool and independent and lived in an urban metropolis, sometimes I just really want to be a normal co-dependent.
It's not that I'm jealous of you. It's not even that I envy you. In fact, I quite like my life; I'm reveling in my freedom and self-discovery and all that other stuff that's talked about in therapy. It's just that, why didn't I ever get that way with a boyfriend? I really doubt that anyone ever coo-ed or aw-ed at our Facebook pictures from fancy parties or Twitter mentions of one another as we're at a picnic on the lake. Maybe if I hadn't been so embarrassed to profess my love on the internet. Or to the person in question. Maybe that was our problem: we were never public enough because I never wanted it to be.
I know it's probably not healthy to idolize someone or something or some digital representation of that "one" or "thing." But I can't help it. You seem to really "get" one another, and to genuinely enjoy each other's company, and you guys are probably never worried about saying the wrong thing or forgetting to shave your legs because you know that the person will love you anyways/besides/because of your faults. I know there's more to relationships than that, but I dunno, I think that's a pretty integral part.
Do you guys really go to the coffee shop together to read? Do you really have a dog that you take on walks along big shady boulevards? He actually invited you on a cross-county trip to visit his friends? And, like, is the lighting really always that good wherever you guys are? It's cool that you guys like the same music. Did he dress that well before you guys started dating? Wow. And it's nice that he likes you even when you wear that one sweater that makes you look like you have jaundice or have an underwear line in your dress. I'm just saying.
I wish you two the best, really, but can you please stay out of my news feed, my Instagram, my Twitter, and my Gchat status bar for that matter? You know, I'm just going along, minding my own business, when up pop you two! Like really, can't you put that stuff behind closed doors? I don't want to de-friend or un-follow you, but discovering the joys of your relationship when I'm 23 and it's 5:15pm and rushing home to feed my cat is not exactly encouraging stuff.
I'd love to see you guys in person. Maybe we could go to your coffee house, take the dog for a walk, you know, be friends in the real world? Maybe then I wouldn't feel so funny seeing pictures of you guys, because I'd finally understand how much fun you're having.
Seriously, it's too much. We get it, the web gets it, God and my parents and everyone else gets it. You guys really like each other, probably even love each other, and it makes me feel funny. Funny like I'm the 2012 version of Mary Tyler Moore, and while she was cool and independent and lived in an urban metropolis, sometimes I just really want to be a normal co-dependent.
It's not that I'm jealous of you. It's not even that I envy you. In fact, I quite like my life; I'm reveling in my freedom and self-discovery and all that other stuff that's talked about in therapy. It's just that, why didn't I ever get that way with a boyfriend? I really doubt that anyone ever coo-ed or aw-ed at our Facebook pictures from fancy parties or Twitter mentions of one another as we're at a picnic on the lake. Maybe if I hadn't been so embarrassed to profess my love on the internet. Or to the person in question. Maybe that was our problem: we were never public enough because I never wanted it to be.
I know it's probably not healthy to idolize someone or something or some digital representation of that "one" or "thing." But I can't help it. You seem to really "get" one another, and to genuinely enjoy each other's company, and you guys are probably never worried about saying the wrong thing or forgetting to shave your legs because you know that the person will love you anyways/besides/because of your faults. I know there's more to relationships than that, but I dunno, I think that's a pretty integral part.
Do you guys really go to the coffee shop together to read? Do you really have a dog that you take on walks along big shady boulevards? He actually invited you on a cross-county trip to visit his friends? And, like, is the lighting really always that good wherever you guys are? It's cool that you guys like the same music. Did he dress that well before you guys started dating? Wow. And it's nice that he likes you even when you wear that one sweater that makes you look like you have jaundice or have an underwear line in your dress. I'm just saying.
I wish you two the best, really, but can you please stay out of my news feed, my Instagram, my Twitter, and my Gchat status bar for that matter? You know, I'm just going along, minding my own business, when up pop you two! Like really, can't you put that stuff behind closed doors? I don't want to de-friend or un-follow you, but discovering the joys of your relationship when I'm 23 and it's 5:15pm and rushing home to feed my cat is not exactly encouraging stuff.
I'd love to see you guys in person. Maybe we could go to your coffee house, take the dog for a walk, you know, be friends in the real world? Maybe then I wouldn't feel so funny seeing pictures of you guys, because I'd finally understand how much fun you're having.
No comments:
Post a Comment